Chapter 1 - "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff"
Explain one example where I let something get to me.
I often find myself letting small, insignificant things get to me and ruin my mood, mindset, and sometimes even my day. An example of this would be the attitude and mood of my family members, everyone has something different going on in their lives and it’s not always positive. I let myself get carried away in their moods which could potentially ruin mine. Being around my family all day can be emotional exhausting due to the up and downs of everyone’s day and I need to learn to not let their day affect my mood. For example, if my mom had a rough day at work she’ll bring that negative energy home with her and I’ll let it get to me and put me in a negative mood. Overall, I need to learn to not let other people’s mood disturb my inner peace.
Chapter 2 - "Make Peace with Imperfection"
How does your "ego" distract you?
My ego distracts me by always wanting to be the best no mater what. My ego tells me being the best version of myself is not enough, I must strive to be better than the best version of myself. My ego tells me that I can always be better, smarter, stronger if I just push myself. This is unhealthy because I often push myself passed my limits. I have broken down my body and mind trying to strive to be this “best” version of myself, and it’s never attainable. I must learn to not listen to my ego and accept that sometimes I need a break. Sometimes I need to take the time to rest and recover before pushing myself more and more. I’ve been trying to focus more on becoming at peace with myself, with my mind and body so that I don’t push myself passed my limits when the time comes.
Chapter 3 - "Let Go of the Idea that Gentle, Relaxed People Can't Be Superachievers"
Thoughts on, "When you have what you want (inner peace), you are less distracted by your wants, needs, desires, and concerns. It's thus easier to concentrate, focus, achieve your goals, and to give back to others."
I relate to this quote very deeply in the sense that when inner peace is achieved, I will focus more on me growing as a person rather than only seeing the mistakes I make. Instead of making a mistake and letting my mind sit on it for days, weeks, or even months, I will be able to acknowledge the mistake, fix it, learn from it, and move. I want to be able to grow from my mistakes rather than to let them destroy any progress I’ve made. I also relate to this in the idea that when inner peace is achieved I can be content with who I am while still being able to grow, to be comfortable in the uncomfortable. With a solid, steady mind, I believe I can achieve my goals no matter what is thrown my way. Having a strong foundation holds everything up just as it’s about to fall and the mind is the perfect place to start a strong foundation.
Chapter 4 - “Be Aware of the Snowball Effect of Your Thinking”
Do you notice how your body and mind feel when your thinking is out of control?
When my thinking rolls out of control my mind and body becomes anxious and overwhelmed. My hands start to shake, I can’t stay still, sometimes I cry, sometimes it’s hard to breathe, my entire body feels like an electric current is running through it. I get incredibly anxious and nervous, I overthink every little mistake I made, and I often beat myself up by repeating the event in my head. For example, if I have an off game I usually can’t sleep that night because I let my thoughts control me. I obsess over every mistake made and how I could’ve done better instead of giving myself permission to accept my mistakes and grow. This chapter hit close to home with me because I often find myself letting my thoughts run wild. I’m working on letting myself accept my mistakes and move on rather than harp on them and allow my mistakes to control my life. This is not an easy task for me but I’m working hard at it everyday.
Chapter 5 - “Develop Your Compassion”
Can you recall a time when you made something “big” and dramatic when in reality it was “small” and not that big of a deal?
I am guilty of doing this too often. Whenever I get stressed out or overwhelmed everything seems to become a much bigger deal than it is. I don’t show this through letting my emotions run free. I often isolate myself, sit down, and work until everything is figured out. Sometimes this takes several hours and I recognize it’s not healthy. I find myself ignoring everything around me, even my own well-being, in order to get this work done. A simple math assignment becomes the biggest problem in the world and I could spend 2-3 hours on one complicated problem. This wastes my time and efficiency. I’m learning to take care of my responsibilities little by little as they come and go.
Chapter 6 - “Remind Yourself that When You Die, Your “In Basket” Won’t Be Empty”
What does your “in basket” look like? And will it be there tomorrow…
When I read this chapter I realized that I’ve been telling myself that as soon as I finish this one assignment I will feel calm and more at ease. When in reality, there will always be more and more assignments and responsibilities tomorrow. If I live by the idea that once I finish an assignment I will be calm, then I will never be able to be peaceful. My “in basket” is any tasks, responsibilities, assignments, or even goals I have. I often focus on only what needs to be accomplished, yet I don’t allow myself to celebrate what's already been accomplished. I believe my “in basket” will eventually go away as I realize life is not one giant checklist. I will teach myself how to not focus on what needs to be done but instead enjoy every task I complete.
Chapter 7 - “Don’t Interrupt Others or Finish Their Sentences”
Do you believe you are a strong listener or could use some work?
Initially I thought I was good listener. I make good eye contact, I speak clearly, and I’m engaged in the conversation. Yet, after reading this chapter I realized how often I finish people’s sentences. When I’m in a hurry, and I know which direction the conversation is going, I will finish the person’s sentence and then respond quickly. I never thought of it as trying to rush someone along but I see now how it could be taken as though I’m not thoroughly engaged in the conversation. I could definitely use some work when it comes to that aspect of a conversation.
Chapter 8 - “Do Something Nice for Someone Else-and Don’t Tell Anyone About it”
Recall a time you have given, did you expect acknowledgement?
I recall several times I have given to someone and sometimes I hope for acknowledgement and sometimes I don’t. Many times just seeing the person’s face light up and smile is enough reward for me. There have been times when I’ve done something and hoped for a thank you in return. A great example of this is if I clean the house while everyone else is at work. But on the other hand, writing the valentine’s heart for our students feels amazing when they read their heart and smile. I feel like it could go either way depending on what the scenario is but I’m working on not expecting acknowledgement when that feeling comes.
Chapter 9 - Let Other Have the Glory
Have you experienced someone stomping on your story? How did you feel?
I’m sure we have all experienced this at some point in our lives and I am no different. In my family I am the youngest and sometimes when I’m telling a story about something I’m proud about I get over talked. It does not feel good in any way. It makes me feel small and not important. I try my best to allow others to have their glory and to support them when they have accomplished something they are proud of but I am not perfect. I make mistakes, as we all do, and I have started catching myself when I over talk or steal someones glory.
Chapter 10 - Learn to Live in the Present Moment
What are some ways you stay in the present moment?
I resonated with this chapter greatly because I find myself worrying about the future or holding on to the past a little too often. A great method I’ve learned is to still and ground myself. I like to meditate when I find myself not able to live in the present. I take a deep breath and just be still. I ground myself to the feeling of being present and focus my mind on my breathing rather than an assignment I have due tomorrow or how I could’ve done better on that test. A few minutes a day to just sit and be is how I try to keep myself in the present moment as much as possible.
Chapter 11 - Imagine Everyone Is Enlightened Except You
Think of a time of frustration, now look at it as a moment of being taught...what did you learn?
As we were reading this chapter I fell in love with this idea, this concept that everything is lesson. I realize I do not have large amounts of patience and I am working on that and I feel like this is a great place to start. From this perspective, I have been taught so much, I have been taught patience, understanding, compassion, and much more. Every stranger carries a lesson and every situation is a chance to learn and grow. I will use this perspective to grow and become more understanding as a person
Chapter 12 - “Let Others Be ‘Right’ Most of the Time”
The next time you are in a discussion/argument, let the other person be right and take notice on the initial feeling that transpires.
I personally did not agree with or like this chapter, the way the author went about portraying the message did not sit with me right. I believe that sometimes on small squabbles you can put your ego aside and agree to disagree but I do not agree that one should let the other person be correct simply to avoid conflict. Nonetheless, I did try this challenge simply to say I tried it. My sister and I often fight and argue. I let her be right while I walked away from the argument. This did not transpire happy feelings, instead I felt small, not heard, disrespected, and angry. I understand putting aside ego in order to make better connections but I will not put aside what I believe in simply to avoid conflict. If I don’t believe in something I won’t be as stubborn to fight for it but until then, I cannot simply bow down.
Chapter 13 - “Become More Patient”
Do you ever have a reflective moment when you realize you are so very small in this vast world and really your ‘drama’ isn't that big a deal?
Yes, 100%, this happens very often. I find myself in my own head thinking a lot which is bound to lead to thinking about broader concepts and ideas such as how time is a concept, happiness is just a chemical equation, and just how small I am in the vast universe. It really puts small squabbles and embarrassing moments into view and makes me realize just how little everything matters. Things only have power over you if you give it power.
Chapter 14 - “Create ‘Patience Practice Periods’”
Do you have a “Mantra”, a statement that you make to yourself daily or weekly?
I wouldn’t say I have a specific mantra or statement but I often find myself listening to motivational speakers or telling myself I can do it all. This is how I keep myself motivated and going. Between AP/Honor classes, three sports, and class president, things can get busy and often stressful. I find that if I tell myself I can do it, whether that's pushing myself the extra mile in practice, or taking a step further when studying, or creating calendars and planning for events early, I always convince myself to get it done and get it done right.
Chapter 15 - “Be the First One to Act Loving or Reach Out”
Have you lost a relationship because something “small” created a “big” divide?
Yes I have, I’m sure we have all lost a friend or loved one due to a small issue that blew up and became much larger than it needed to. I lost one of my closest friends because of a misunderstanding and miscommunication that could have easily been resolved. Thinking back to the event, it was for the better that things ended. We went our separate ways and that was it. From now on I always make a large effort to make sure there is no miscommunication or misunderstanding when I get into a disagreement with somebody. I make sure both parties are understood and whatever was meant to be said was communicated.
Chapter 16 - “As Yourself the Question, ‘Will This Matter a Year From Now?’”
What do you hope to do a year from now?
This is a very broad question that is hard to answer. In a year from now I will have no idea what I went through or how my life changed. I can only hope to be happy with where I end up, having no regrets. I hope to still have good relationships with my friends, family, and loved ones. I want to be in good health and still be able to play the sports I love. Hopefully by this time next year I will have narrowed down what I want to do in my future a little. Hopefully my academics are still great and I can focus on my future and accomplishing it. Due to not knowing what will happen in the future, this is all I can really hope for.
Chapter 17 - “Surrender to the Fact that Life Isn’t Fair”
Is life meant to be fair? What does that even mean?
I don’t believe life is meant to be fair. Everyone is given a different life with different circumstances therefore it is not possible for life to be even remotely fair. With that being said, I do believe in karma. If someone does something bad then karma will make its way back to them. We can’t control what happens to us but merely how we react to it and deal with the situation. Life isn’t fair but we just have to ride it like a roller coaster, the good, the bad, and everything in between.
Chapter 18 - “Allow Yourself to Be Bored”
Do you take time to be bored?
I would have to say yes and no to this question. For the yes, occasionally I will sit down and meditate and allow myself to be, but only if I have the time. If I am busy, which is more often than not, even if I try to sit down and meditate all my mind goes back to is how much work I need to get done. After this my anxiety starts raising and I start stressing. The longer I sit and wait the more anxious and stressed out I get. If I try to just fight through I get emotionally and physically exhausted and breakdown. When I have work to do I stay away from allowing myself to be bored so I can focus on my work and get it done.
Chapter 19 - “Lower Your Tolerance to Stress”
Have you been taught to believe high stress is a positive thing?
Yes, I would say I have been. I’ve constantly been told that if I can handle the stress and work through it then it’ll make me a stronger person and build character or some cheesy stuff like that. With the amount of stress I’ve been put under I have seen physical changes to my health. I developed an astigmatism, TMJ, pains and aches, and anxiety. I really try to monitor my stress and lower it when I can, sometimes in inevitable and I just have to deal with it. I will never think stress is a positive thing for me ever again.
Chapter 20 - “Once a Week, Write a Heartfelt Letter”
When was the last time you sat down and wrote a letter to someone with gratitude?
I’d say the last time I wrote an actual full letter was to my sister telling her that although she’s a pain in the neck most days, I still love her and appreciate her. Although, I think it’s important to express your gratitude for your loved ones even if it isn’t in a long, handwritten letter. Sometimes a small text telling your mom you appreciate her or writing a cute note to your friend during class, even if it’s a small phrase, is important. Most of the time people are busy and don’t exactly have time to spill their feelings and love for someone all over a page, and sometimes people just aren’t good at expressing their emotions. Because of this I have come to love the small things. What most people find insignificant and unimportant are things I deeply appreciate and love. Whether it's a friend sending a funny tiktok that reminded them of me or an old friend asking to go out to lunch one day, whatever it may be, I’ve learned to love even the smallest amounts of thought and gratitude and sometimes that’s all you need to get through the day.
Explain one example where I let something get to me.
I often find myself letting small, insignificant things get to me and ruin my mood, mindset, and sometimes even my day. An example of this would be the attitude and mood of my family members, everyone has something different going on in their lives and it’s not always positive. I let myself get carried away in their moods which could potentially ruin mine. Being around my family all day can be emotional exhausting due to the up and downs of everyone’s day and I need to learn to not let their day affect my mood. For example, if my mom had a rough day at work she’ll bring that negative energy home with her and I’ll let it get to me and put me in a negative mood. Overall, I need to learn to not let other people’s mood disturb my inner peace.
Chapter 2 - "Make Peace with Imperfection"
How does your "ego" distract you?
My ego distracts me by always wanting to be the best no mater what. My ego tells me being the best version of myself is not enough, I must strive to be better than the best version of myself. My ego tells me that I can always be better, smarter, stronger if I just push myself. This is unhealthy because I often push myself passed my limits. I have broken down my body and mind trying to strive to be this “best” version of myself, and it’s never attainable. I must learn to not listen to my ego and accept that sometimes I need a break. Sometimes I need to take the time to rest and recover before pushing myself more and more. I’ve been trying to focus more on becoming at peace with myself, with my mind and body so that I don’t push myself passed my limits when the time comes.
Chapter 3 - "Let Go of the Idea that Gentle, Relaxed People Can't Be Superachievers"
Thoughts on, "When you have what you want (inner peace), you are less distracted by your wants, needs, desires, and concerns. It's thus easier to concentrate, focus, achieve your goals, and to give back to others."
I relate to this quote very deeply in the sense that when inner peace is achieved, I will focus more on me growing as a person rather than only seeing the mistakes I make. Instead of making a mistake and letting my mind sit on it for days, weeks, or even months, I will be able to acknowledge the mistake, fix it, learn from it, and move. I want to be able to grow from my mistakes rather than to let them destroy any progress I’ve made. I also relate to this in the idea that when inner peace is achieved I can be content with who I am while still being able to grow, to be comfortable in the uncomfortable. With a solid, steady mind, I believe I can achieve my goals no matter what is thrown my way. Having a strong foundation holds everything up just as it’s about to fall and the mind is the perfect place to start a strong foundation.
Chapter 4 - “Be Aware of the Snowball Effect of Your Thinking”
Do you notice how your body and mind feel when your thinking is out of control?
When my thinking rolls out of control my mind and body becomes anxious and overwhelmed. My hands start to shake, I can’t stay still, sometimes I cry, sometimes it’s hard to breathe, my entire body feels like an electric current is running through it. I get incredibly anxious and nervous, I overthink every little mistake I made, and I often beat myself up by repeating the event in my head. For example, if I have an off game I usually can’t sleep that night because I let my thoughts control me. I obsess over every mistake made and how I could’ve done better instead of giving myself permission to accept my mistakes and grow. This chapter hit close to home with me because I often find myself letting my thoughts run wild. I’m working on letting myself accept my mistakes and move on rather than harp on them and allow my mistakes to control my life. This is not an easy task for me but I’m working hard at it everyday.
Chapter 5 - “Develop Your Compassion”
Can you recall a time when you made something “big” and dramatic when in reality it was “small” and not that big of a deal?
I am guilty of doing this too often. Whenever I get stressed out or overwhelmed everything seems to become a much bigger deal than it is. I don’t show this through letting my emotions run free. I often isolate myself, sit down, and work until everything is figured out. Sometimes this takes several hours and I recognize it’s not healthy. I find myself ignoring everything around me, even my own well-being, in order to get this work done. A simple math assignment becomes the biggest problem in the world and I could spend 2-3 hours on one complicated problem. This wastes my time and efficiency. I’m learning to take care of my responsibilities little by little as they come and go.
Chapter 6 - “Remind Yourself that When You Die, Your “In Basket” Won’t Be Empty”
What does your “in basket” look like? And will it be there tomorrow…
When I read this chapter I realized that I’ve been telling myself that as soon as I finish this one assignment I will feel calm and more at ease. When in reality, there will always be more and more assignments and responsibilities tomorrow. If I live by the idea that once I finish an assignment I will be calm, then I will never be able to be peaceful. My “in basket” is any tasks, responsibilities, assignments, or even goals I have. I often focus on only what needs to be accomplished, yet I don’t allow myself to celebrate what's already been accomplished. I believe my “in basket” will eventually go away as I realize life is not one giant checklist. I will teach myself how to not focus on what needs to be done but instead enjoy every task I complete.
Chapter 7 - “Don’t Interrupt Others or Finish Their Sentences”
Do you believe you are a strong listener or could use some work?
Initially I thought I was good listener. I make good eye contact, I speak clearly, and I’m engaged in the conversation. Yet, after reading this chapter I realized how often I finish people’s sentences. When I’m in a hurry, and I know which direction the conversation is going, I will finish the person’s sentence and then respond quickly. I never thought of it as trying to rush someone along but I see now how it could be taken as though I’m not thoroughly engaged in the conversation. I could definitely use some work when it comes to that aspect of a conversation.
Chapter 8 - “Do Something Nice for Someone Else-and Don’t Tell Anyone About it”
Recall a time you have given, did you expect acknowledgement?
I recall several times I have given to someone and sometimes I hope for acknowledgement and sometimes I don’t. Many times just seeing the person’s face light up and smile is enough reward for me. There have been times when I’ve done something and hoped for a thank you in return. A great example of this is if I clean the house while everyone else is at work. But on the other hand, writing the valentine’s heart for our students feels amazing when they read their heart and smile. I feel like it could go either way depending on what the scenario is but I’m working on not expecting acknowledgement when that feeling comes.
Chapter 9 - Let Other Have the Glory
Have you experienced someone stomping on your story? How did you feel?
I’m sure we have all experienced this at some point in our lives and I am no different. In my family I am the youngest and sometimes when I’m telling a story about something I’m proud about I get over talked. It does not feel good in any way. It makes me feel small and not important. I try my best to allow others to have their glory and to support them when they have accomplished something they are proud of but I am not perfect. I make mistakes, as we all do, and I have started catching myself when I over talk or steal someones glory.
Chapter 10 - Learn to Live in the Present Moment
What are some ways you stay in the present moment?
I resonated with this chapter greatly because I find myself worrying about the future or holding on to the past a little too often. A great method I’ve learned is to still and ground myself. I like to meditate when I find myself not able to live in the present. I take a deep breath and just be still. I ground myself to the feeling of being present and focus my mind on my breathing rather than an assignment I have due tomorrow or how I could’ve done better on that test. A few minutes a day to just sit and be is how I try to keep myself in the present moment as much as possible.
Chapter 11 - Imagine Everyone Is Enlightened Except You
Think of a time of frustration, now look at it as a moment of being taught...what did you learn?
As we were reading this chapter I fell in love with this idea, this concept that everything is lesson. I realize I do not have large amounts of patience and I am working on that and I feel like this is a great place to start. From this perspective, I have been taught so much, I have been taught patience, understanding, compassion, and much more. Every stranger carries a lesson and every situation is a chance to learn and grow. I will use this perspective to grow and become more understanding as a person
Chapter 12 - “Let Others Be ‘Right’ Most of the Time”
The next time you are in a discussion/argument, let the other person be right and take notice on the initial feeling that transpires.
I personally did not agree with or like this chapter, the way the author went about portraying the message did not sit with me right. I believe that sometimes on small squabbles you can put your ego aside and agree to disagree but I do not agree that one should let the other person be correct simply to avoid conflict. Nonetheless, I did try this challenge simply to say I tried it. My sister and I often fight and argue. I let her be right while I walked away from the argument. This did not transpire happy feelings, instead I felt small, not heard, disrespected, and angry. I understand putting aside ego in order to make better connections but I will not put aside what I believe in simply to avoid conflict. If I don’t believe in something I won’t be as stubborn to fight for it but until then, I cannot simply bow down.
Chapter 13 - “Become More Patient”
Do you ever have a reflective moment when you realize you are so very small in this vast world and really your ‘drama’ isn't that big a deal?
Yes, 100%, this happens very often. I find myself in my own head thinking a lot which is bound to lead to thinking about broader concepts and ideas such as how time is a concept, happiness is just a chemical equation, and just how small I am in the vast universe. It really puts small squabbles and embarrassing moments into view and makes me realize just how little everything matters. Things only have power over you if you give it power.
Chapter 14 - “Create ‘Patience Practice Periods’”
Do you have a “Mantra”, a statement that you make to yourself daily or weekly?
I wouldn’t say I have a specific mantra or statement but I often find myself listening to motivational speakers or telling myself I can do it all. This is how I keep myself motivated and going. Between AP/Honor classes, three sports, and class president, things can get busy and often stressful. I find that if I tell myself I can do it, whether that's pushing myself the extra mile in practice, or taking a step further when studying, or creating calendars and planning for events early, I always convince myself to get it done and get it done right.
Chapter 15 - “Be the First One to Act Loving or Reach Out”
Have you lost a relationship because something “small” created a “big” divide?
Yes I have, I’m sure we have all lost a friend or loved one due to a small issue that blew up and became much larger than it needed to. I lost one of my closest friends because of a misunderstanding and miscommunication that could have easily been resolved. Thinking back to the event, it was for the better that things ended. We went our separate ways and that was it. From now on I always make a large effort to make sure there is no miscommunication or misunderstanding when I get into a disagreement with somebody. I make sure both parties are understood and whatever was meant to be said was communicated.
Chapter 16 - “As Yourself the Question, ‘Will This Matter a Year From Now?’”
What do you hope to do a year from now?
This is a very broad question that is hard to answer. In a year from now I will have no idea what I went through or how my life changed. I can only hope to be happy with where I end up, having no regrets. I hope to still have good relationships with my friends, family, and loved ones. I want to be in good health and still be able to play the sports I love. Hopefully by this time next year I will have narrowed down what I want to do in my future a little. Hopefully my academics are still great and I can focus on my future and accomplishing it. Due to not knowing what will happen in the future, this is all I can really hope for.
Chapter 17 - “Surrender to the Fact that Life Isn’t Fair”
Is life meant to be fair? What does that even mean?
I don’t believe life is meant to be fair. Everyone is given a different life with different circumstances therefore it is not possible for life to be even remotely fair. With that being said, I do believe in karma. If someone does something bad then karma will make its way back to them. We can’t control what happens to us but merely how we react to it and deal with the situation. Life isn’t fair but we just have to ride it like a roller coaster, the good, the bad, and everything in between.
Chapter 18 - “Allow Yourself to Be Bored”
Do you take time to be bored?
I would have to say yes and no to this question. For the yes, occasionally I will sit down and meditate and allow myself to be, but only if I have the time. If I am busy, which is more often than not, even if I try to sit down and meditate all my mind goes back to is how much work I need to get done. After this my anxiety starts raising and I start stressing. The longer I sit and wait the more anxious and stressed out I get. If I try to just fight through I get emotionally and physically exhausted and breakdown. When I have work to do I stay away from allowing myself to be bored so I can focus on my work and get it done.
Chapter 19 - “Lower Your Tolerance to Stress”
Have you been taught to believe high stress is a positive thing?
Yes, I would say I have been. I’ve constantly been told that if I can handle the stress and work through it then it’ll make me a stronger person and build character or some cheesy stuff like that. With the amount of stress I’ve been put under I have seen physical changes to my health. I developed an astigmatism, TMJ, pains and aches, and anxiety. I really try to monitor my stress and lower it when I can, sometimes in inevitable and I just have to deal with it. I will never think stress is a positive thing for me ever again.
Chapter 20 - “Once a Week, Write a Heartfelt Letter”
When was the last time you sat down and wrote a letter to someone with gratitude?
I’d say the last time I wrote an actual full letter was to my sister telling her that although she’s a pain in the neck most days, I still love her and appreciate her. Although, I think it’s important to express your gratitude for your loved ones even if it isn’t in a long, handwritten letter. Sometimes a small text telling your mom you appreciate her or writing a cute note to your friend during class, even if it’s a small phrase, is important. Most of the time people are busy and don’t exactly have time to spill their feelings and love for someone all over a page, and sometimes people just aren’t good at expressing their emotions. Because of this I have come to love the small things. What most people find insignificant and unimportant are things I deeply appreciate and love. Whether it's a friend sending a funny tiktok that reminded them of me or an old friend asking to go out to lunch one day, whatever it may be, I’ve learned to love even the smallest amounts of thought and gratitude and sometimes that’s all you need to get through the day.